what means the world to you

walking through the air conditioned atrium, opening the glass doors, the crowds streaming by in their tucked in t-shirts, carrying purses, carrying cameras, heads craned to the upper level store windows, standing in a bright clean store, walking through the doorway into the hot sun, finding shade, the cool of the metal bench, the night that was twelve hours ago, the few miles between us, the few inches between us now, the pouring rain and the cigarette smoked in the doorway, the laughter that when it starts never stops when i expect it to, the shared glances, the comparisons, the clean spring of your smile aimed at everyone, the beads of perspiration on the plastic cups, the straws aimed for the heavens, the stripes on my shirt, the wavy shadows of the heat rising from the hood of the car, the traffic streaming under us on the freeeway, the pine tree tops flashing by endlessly, the moths hovering around the outdoor floodlights, the vibration of my phone, your name on my caller id, standing in my driveway at dusk, the fallen branch blocking the sidewalk, teenagers packed in cars, magazines, tv news, amber alerts on the radio as we glide under the elm canopy, the interrupted r&b singer, the death of a newsman, the quiet of the soul food restaurant, the lives and time mingling together waiting for the food to cool off, the yellow sand under my feet, the crunch of pine needles, the rush of clear splashing water from a spigot, my mother's grave, your light brown hair, the scent of my deodorant, in a way i worry i might hold you so tightly you disappear, the commuter bus station empty, the expensive atm, the abandoned theater, the suburbs are ours to explore, the empty tennis court, my fourth cigarette in a row, the ghosts of offices long destroyed, your small shopping bag, your endless kindness, the years where i forgot about you, the minute i remembered your name, the seconds i saw you walking down the sidewalk, the sarcastic clerk, the burned-out brake light, the power windows, the spinning rims, if there is one decision for every hundred mistakes i am willing to keep this one and make one hundred more.